I caught some footage on CTV of Stephen Harper bringing his son and daughter to school, and I noticed he shakes hands with them when he sends them off. Awesome.

I dropped by Proud to be Canadian hoping to stir up some trouble, but what I got was a whole 120 ml can of whoop ass! The intellectual prowess of these conservatives blew me right out of my chair and into the Lenin bust I have perched on the altar beneath my poster of Stalin.

Every time I tried to make a point they would come at me from every angle. I was simply overwhelmed by the depth and clarity of their arguments. Check this out:

There was simply no way to compete…

I think I will just hide away for a while until the embarassment subsides. Nonetheless, I just want to say thanks for the opportunity to share my ideas. It was enlightening to find that there were so many conservatives who could hold their own in a discussion.

Thanks again.

It was fun.

Thanks.

I hope one day I am smart enough to discuss things with those conservatives.

Thanks again.

I was also happy to see that rules regarding hate-speech and abusive speech were followed in the way they are usually followed on a conservative blog.

Remember: Hate-speech isn’t hate-speech if it’s against somebody you’re allowed to hate…

To prepare the common american to war, it takes a few little ingredients and a nice receipe to get the perfect cake. First, you have to demonstate how the country you are going to war with is evil in nature. It starts very early in the game and as an american with a limited knowledge of the world (thanks to Fox news and CNN), you start noticing everywhere the name of this new country that appeared on the map. In the present case we have Iran, but surely you are familiar with Iraq. I got the pleasure to start reading about Iran while in Texas which was about a year and a half ago. Now in these articles, documentaries, interviews, … you start hearing about the horrible things the leaders of that country do to their citizens and what they really have in mind for YOU the average FREE american! And we surely know they are coming for the americans because ultimately everyone does! Once you have learned enough about those horrible serial killing bastards that are ready to slaughter you, enslave the women, and eat the children, you hear that not only those evil doers are against you but they are getting ready while you are sitting on your ass watching football and drinking beer. They are going to have a nuclear bomb, or probably weapons of mass destructions, or maybe even they are hiring the aliens to attack you while they organize a terrorist attack Now you realize that as the superpower of the world you weren’t able to handle Iraq (which ultimately didn’t have weapons of mass destructions, or nukes or any weapons as a matter of fact…) so it doesn’t seem like a good idea to go to Iran. And if you do so all by yourself like the time before, you might even get you hand slapped by bigger parties this time around. So now your leaders have to not only convince you but they also have to convince the entire world of how evil Iran is. Interestingly enough, people with their thinking cap on came accross this time around and said no and decided to tell the truth. Now they do that and you, the average american, just to show how really stupid you are, go on and bash them on their forums about how they are with the ennemy. Let’s take a specific example here: Kevin’s site. Now the guy’s american. He has no reason to take any sides with Iran… How idiotic can you get when you bash someone because they have a higher thinking power than you do. I read a couple of very good articles and when i have time I will try and post a summary of them up here. It is a very good coverage of the real reasons of what was going on in Iraq/Iran right now. Until then here is a link to it. One last thing before I wrap this up, and the real reason why I am posting, when i saw on yahoo news about ex-iran hostages reuniting. 20 of those 66 gathered to fuel the war ideology of the monkey in power. To those 20, I would like to say bravo for your stupidity, it’s not 444 days they should have kept you captive, it’s an eternity. Next time when you are in diplomatic session in another country, you won’t arrange for the assassination of a democratically elected figure (Mossadegh). The meaning of freedom and democracy needs to be redefined because in american it must certainely mean something else than in plain english…

The Blogging Tories controversy says only one thing to me: The Tories have won the blogging war. Liblogs (bloggers who support the Liberals) and the Blogging Dippers (bloggers who support the NDP) have pretty much failed.
Tory bloggers have done an admirable job this election. They have managed to post all sorts of ridiculous things unchallenged, because the left is so intellectually weak. Every time Liberals tried to get in on a Tory thread, the Tories would just gangbang them. They have so much ammunition to use against Liberals, it’s outrageous. And what do the Liberals have? “Harper is George Bush’s pet dog” and “Harper hates homos”. And look how Harper has responded: By saying, “That’s crazy” (with that smile that says “They’re on to me!”) But at least he’s confident. Martin just looks desperate. His call for a union of “progressive” voters almost made me barf. I wondered how tax cuts, the privatization of health care behind our backs, corruption, and our treatment of Aboriginals has been progressive.
Liberal and NDP bloggers have spent most of their time telling Canada that Stephen Harper is a scary man instead of telling us about the alternatives. And since I’m a commie, I’m too lazy to do anything about it. *sigh*

A worsening trend I’ve noticed is our division into two camps and the rise of increasingly fundamentalist partisan politics. Both Conservatives and Liberals talk in a way reminiscent of the language being used in the U.S. Any attempt at ideological debate with a Conservative supporter is met with a re-hashing of some portion of the Conservative party platform. These aren’t “right wingers”, or even true conservatives for that matter. Their fiscal policies are classically Liberal. No, these are just people with no ideas of their own - empty vessels waiting to be filled by whatever the Conservative party pleases.
Having an ideological debate with a Liberal is a little bit less like arguing with a partisan, and more like arguing with a child.
“The Liberal’s Aboriginal policies have been a drastic failure”.
“Stephen Harper looks evil”.
Ugh.

Courtesy of Rick Mercer’s site, here is the Conservative’s very own Rondo Thomas - Minister of Holy Wars!

CLIP

5 more days ’till somebody like him is sitting in our house of commons!

In the light of the new international drama going on about Iran, which will ultimately be an excuse for an invasion by the “Crusaders”. I have been posting much lately but try to get the good stuff accross whenever I get a chance.
The first one is by an ex-military (I believe he is a general but I am not 100% certain on that) in regards to the iraq war and the to-come iran war. Very interesting. There is also an audio version of it for those would rather listen to it: Article / Audio file are listed here.
This second one is a little bit of a longer read and written by a Native-American professor of Ethnic Studies and Coordinator of American Indian Studies. He actually gave a live speech and referred to “Chickens coming home to roost” in reference to 911. Of course, one can imagine the amount of trouble he went through after he expressed his opinion in the land of “free” speech. Read the article here and if interested buy the whole book.
Whatever you do though, don’t stop using your brain because the moment you do, you are done for. You are a grain of sand taken away by the sea.

Che getting ready to get some…

It’s a well known fact that communists are better in bed. Both males and females. Lets see why.

Males:

Capitalist males are greedy lovers. They fuck the way the market operates: As fast and expediently as possible to achieve the desired result regardless of the consequences. And there’s no fair trade.
Communist males, on the other hand, believe in market planning. They are very deliberate and methodical. This doesn’t mean they can’t be spontaneous; after all, they can be deliberately spontaneous! They try as best they can to share. Pleasuring the female is as important as his own pleasure, and if the woman is unsatisfied, the communist man will reimburse her. That is, unless the woman is simply unsatisfied that she didn’t have an orgasm, to which the male communist responds, “stop being such a greedy bitch and enjoy yourself!” Both the communist man and woman believe the G-Spot is a myth concocted by liberal feminists who can’t deal with the fact that guys can get off so easily.

A few other traits of the communist male:

- Bigger penises –> Why? Because. That’s why.

- Last longer –> Communists practice self control in every aspect of their lives. “Hmm, those Gap jeans look mighty fine, but maybe I shouldn’t buy them because I’m almost $2000 in the hole from grad applications”.

- Don’t cheat on their lovers –> Communists don’t cheat on their lovers because they don’t believe that cheating is truly “cheating”. We call it “spreading the love”. And when bitch is all like, “Why’d you cheat on me?”, we’re just like, “I DIDN’T!”

- Get you drunk on Marxist philosophy –> You’ll never have to worry about your communist man trying to get you drunk because he can do it using the power of his mind.

- Cleaner –> Communist men trim their pubes and all bodily hair, as well as wash regularly. They do this because they believe in public health care, and any man who does not take care of himself is a burden not only unto himself, but on the people.

- Won’t abandon you after they knock you up –> The communist man will stick around as long as it takes to convince you to get an abortion… Even after you conceive.

- Practice safer sex –> See “Cleaner” above.

- Better looking –> For some unknown reason, communist men are way better looking than capitalist men. We also have killer abs.

Females

Communist females are not insecure, obsessive, or jealous (or maybe that’s just my ideal woman). And they fuck the way a communist society would operate… Like wild, untamed animals!! Wrooaarrrr! Capitalist chicks consider you their property, whereas a communist chick understands that you belong to the people (ie: other hot women). Capitalist chicks are always after the orgasm. Communist girls don’t care whether they get an orgasm or not, but if they do that’s great. This is because they understand that women don’t get off as easily as men, and the G-Spot is a myth. They know that the guy can only go once and then he gets all tired and stuff, so they don’t just roll over and sigh after he cums. No, instead they just love it, because they’re selfless, the way a true communist should be.

A few other traits of the communist female:

- Not too skinny and not too fat –> Once again, the communist female remains healthy so as not to be a burden on the public health care system.

- Clean –> They don’t smell like tuna. They smell like vanilla and peaches all the time.

- Way hotter –> They have hotter asses and tits, and dress kind of like hippies, which makes them mysterious because they’re not showing everything off like a little tramp.

- Prettier hair –> They all have dreads, which is totally hot…

- Best head ever –> They give the best head beacuse they’re the least greedy chicks on earth. They just want to give it night and day, and all that practice makes them experts. They also, inexplicably, have perfect pouty lips, AWWW YEAAAH.

- They take it in the bum–> They don’t want to get pregnant and burden the system with another kid, so they take it in the ass on a regular basis.

- They aren’t retarded –> Unlike some leftist chicks, they understand that they have to stay home and breastfeed because the man can’t do it. So they don’t bitch about being at home to take care of the baby, as long as the man is there to help her do it, which is possible in a society that would pay every person for their labour regardless of whether it’s at home or at “work”.

- Tries hard in bed –> Following Marx’s call that there be an equal liability of all to work, the communist girl really tries hard to please her man in bed, jumping and squirming all over the place, and getting all oiled up, and making lots of noises and talking really dirty and… ok, I’ll stop.

I hope this summary provides an adequate enough argument to back my claim that communists are better in bed. If not, it’s because it’s probably not really true, although I am personally pretty good in bed.

Check out this clip, courtesy of Conservative Party of Canada Pundit, Stephen Taylor… You heard me. Taylor runs a Conservative blog that is, for the most part, appropriately critical of the Liberal party.

Mike Duffy finally does something useful when he asks what in the world the Liberals were thinking when they made an ad saying Stephen Harper wanted an increased Canadian miltary presence in our cities.

- First, overwhelm your blog space with little pictures of things that you stole from everywhere. Remember: You don’t have to think for yourself. You can just take funny little pictures and look smart.

- Next, ensure you have a “blogroll” or something with all of your right wing buddies. Since you’re probably insecure, fat, and friendless, you’ll need to create the illusion of having friends. Make a long list. Make it so long there’s no way you have that many friends. If you’re gonna lie you might as well lie BIG.

- Now whore yourself out to some right wing authors and sell their books on your site. It will make it look like you read books, which we all know isn’t true, because the only thing you read is blogs.

- You have to say something about the ACLU. Although nobody knows what the ACLU actually is, we know it’s bad, so replace the “C” with the hammer and sickle and look smart.

- Remember to say you’re “Pro-Victory” in case somebody thinks you’re “Pro-Defeat”.

- Ever taken the time to do research into the philosophical, religious, economic, or feminist debate about abortion? Never mind, just say that it’s bad with a nifty jpeg.

- Make sure you provide a link to the United States Central Command, just in case somebody want to go to… the… United States… um… Central Command…

- Do you think the Israeli flag looks cool? You’re probably pro-Israel. Get a jpeg that says so.

- If your blog was one of the top 15 000 blogs in Idaho, make sure you say so with a little thing that says “Weblog finalist” or something.

- In case people can’t figure out already that you’re a Bush supporter, say so with a “Blogs for Bush” thing. Then when Bush gets impeached or tried at a war crimes tribunal, just say that you were never for Bush and see how many people believe you. Do it.

- Hillary Clinton is prettier than you. You are against Hilary. Say so with a nifty jpeg. Don’t make an argument against her, just get a cool looking picture that makes her look evil.

- If you like military stuff maybe you are a “milblogger”… Whatever, just get the logo, it looks awesome.

- Pretend that you’re more popular than you really are by selling your own merchandise. Nobody will buy it, but hey, now you have a bunch of fucked up T-shirts to get beat up in.

- Don’t forget the content! No right wing blog is truly right wing unless it divides humanity into two distinct groups: Liberals and Conservatives. There is nothing in between and nothing beyond. The world revolves around these two opposing forces. Also remember to link every second word, so people can go find out more about the word and why it’s significant, since your writing has no hope of speaking for itself.

These are just a few ideas to get you started. Happy blogging!